Dreams and finches

I recently had a dream about two star finches.  We lost our star finch, Eric, in 2010.  I have come to realise that one of our zebra finches, Stuart - our longest-term, probably oldest, resident bird - is struggling.  Stu's firm best friend, for years, was Eric - and I begin to see the significance of my recent dream - which did also manage to cover various other issues/factors - current worries - which I can't, and won't, discuss on this blog, or anywhere else - and it would be too hard to know where to start, in any case.

I can only say that I have changed so much inside, spiritually and emotionally, since leaving Reading in October 2000, at not quite twenty-seven years of age, with Colin, my then-boyfriend (husband since March 2001).  At the moment, I feel that I have come to a crossroads, and all of the options look very, very scary and uninviting.  So I am sitting in the middle of the road at present, and hoping not to get hit by just about every passing vehicle.  Most won't change direction in order to avoid hitting me, so I can only jump out of the way at the last minute, or wait to be knocked down, and hope that my injuries will not be fatal.

Does that make sense as a blog post?  I don't really know, but I hope that it does.  I needed to at least try to express my feelings.  Not an easy task right now!

Billy Zed (zebra finch)

I am sad to have to say that Billy, one of our zebra finches, has passed away.  He probably died in the early hours of 17/05.  He had been with us since January 2006.  :-(

Rest in peace, Raz budgie and Kit the zebra finch.

I'm sad to say that we lost Raz budgie a week ago, and one of our zebra finches, Kit, yesterday.

I copied this from my other blog (http://www.paulap.blog.com/):

This morning (a week since Raz passed), I heard from our grey budgie, Bert, who passed away in December 2008.  Bert appeared by my bed in a dream, just before I woke up.  I have heard from Bert before since his death.  Raz was also grey, but very different to Bert - much smaller, with black markings and a pale yellow face.  After we lost Bert, I always knew that another grey budgie would come into our lives but that he wouldn't look like Bert, or Silver (a budgie whom my parents inherited from my late nan), or a grey budgie who a lady bought for her son in a pet shop on the day we bought Nephi, Lehi, Robin and Vernon finches (which also ended up being the day before we lost our beloved lineolated parakeet, Pear).  

I know that it is lazy to copy a whole paragraph from one blog to the other, but I didn't want to have to struggle for the words all over again.  In fact, there are so many aspects to the all of the stories connected with our birds - and I don't think that I've done a great job of explaining.  It reads quite badly, in my own, self-critical opinion - but it will have to do for now.

I updated my poetry site: http://paulapuddephatt.tripod.com/poetry.

More from me soon, hopefully...x